I Was Interviewed, How ’bout That!?

Hey dear readers, guess what?

What? Or, so I’m guessing that is what you just said.

Chicken butt.

Ha, that’s hilarious, can’t believe you fell for that.
Anyway my faithful readers I, your faithful writer, was interviewed by Kristen from Adult Ballerina Project. I think it came out well and I’m happy with my answers, but…

Like anything I’m never 100% satisfied with anything I write. I’ll obsess over each and every word for way too long nearly to the point of obsession. I think I’m happy with it and hit the send button and immediately find obvious flaws that will just drive me nuts, especially items that I no longer have control of the second the send key was struck. I’ve made a huge mistake.

It’s like anything, I’ll blank on a question at a job interview and come up with the perfect answer as soon as I’m about halfway home. That job would have been mine if I’d only had that thought about fifteen minutes earlier. Not to toot my own horn here but I have been interviewed a few times and the same things always happen. I’m sure it’s just me, but I’m a king of playing the what if game.
So that’s me, over thinking the little things, oh well.

Toot toot!

Regardless, I’m thrilled that one, people actually read this thing (thank you all) and secondly, I’m thrilled that I was chosen to be interviewed. There are many people out there who I would have picked way before me, but fortunately that isn’t my job.

So, thanks Kristen for choosing moi. I really enjoy the blog and your Adult Ballerina Pro profiles, keep up the good work! Woot!

Oops I Did It Again

As one of Americas most wisest and profound artists once said, “Oops, I did it again.”
I truly did it again, I crashed in another cyclocross race, just like I did the first race of the season, except I landed on my left knee, not the right like I did in September.

The original crash sidelined me from both ‘cross and ballet. I was about over the ankle issue I suffered in Cali and was chomping at the bit to get back into the studio. Then blammy, not so fast there bike boy, doctors orders.

Flash forward, I was feeling good, and had classes circled on the calendar once again, counting the days until my grand return. Then, like I said above I went and did it again, same type of crash with nearly the same results.

So, I thought about going to class a few days ago. I was feeling good and getting little signs all day long that ballet was in my future. Ran across the schools dance team doing pirouettes to warm out before their practice. So I did one of my own to try to show them I wasn’t just some stranger oggling them. It was pretty good actually. There was a link to some great video on YouTube and then a clip from The Nutcracker on the ARTS network when I flipped on the tv when I got home.

Dear readers, I was feeling good, finally, I got my shit together, and thought hey let’s warm up here before I head out. It was at that point when I discovered that things were not as ready as I had earlier thought. The knee wasn’t having any of it, even the simple stuff, a simple plié for one. It felt good walking, running and even cycling, but not this, no sir.

Ggggrrrrreeeeaaatt (complete with eye-roll), now how long will it be? Well, I have four or so more local races, then nationals in Madison, WI and then UCI world championships in Louisville, KY of all places in February. Hopefully I’ll survive until then. I’ve already promised several that I’ll stop crashing, I guess it’s as ugly to witness as it is to be in them (I actually have little to no memory of either of them, which I almost prefer). Can’t wait to get back, hopefully soon, see you then.

Turnout Is Important

Yes NPR, turnout IS important.

Oh wait, I guess you’re talking about the upcoming elections, yeah I guess that’s important too.

I suppose one could practice one’s turnout as one pulls the lever, marks their box, or puncturing one’s chad. Just go and do it.

I know who I’m voting for.

Chair 2012!

Time Out

It’s been awhile since I have been able to dance, mid August when I was in Portland. I would have been suprised if you were to have told me that I wouldn’t dance again in more than a month.

Time out!

So, I’m sure you’re wondering what the fuck is up with you, I thought you liked ballet.

Well, you are correct there, I love ballet and I try to do it as often as I can. However, I’ve managed to really do a number on my ankle / foot areas. Somehow I kinda twisted / rolled said ankle area somewhere in northern California. I didn’t think much of it at the time and I really didn’t do to much about it aside from the standard ice bags and pills. Then the pain and discomfort just kinda lingerd, and really didn’t go away, not cool, but meh it happens. Plus, I still have the intermentant clicking noise and what feels like a bit like tendonitis both of which I’ve battled for years.

Then I go and crash really hard while cyclocross racing as I’m known to do. Aside from the crash that spit my knee open last year this was the worst crash I’ve ever had the mispleasure to have had. I don’t remember how it happened, all I remember is crawling off the course so I don’t get run over again by the guys who are behind me. All I know is I landed with all my weight onto my knee. It was a wreck that drew a crowd, those usually do not turn out well. I know I’m done immediatly and I might have actually done something bad to myself but nothing life threatning.

FYI Cyclocross crashes are quite common and rarely injure the rider. Trust me, it happens to me all the time.

Long story somewhat short I make an appointment with my doc to get checked out, basically trying to squeeze every ounce of my $20 co-pay. Let’s go nuts and x-ray everything. The knee is fine, just soft tissue damage but nothing that ice and more pills wont take care of. No bone spurs in the ankle, a possible cause of the clicking, but it could be arthritis (I thought that was just for old people). Oh, and a broken finger, a cracked bone in the joint of my left index finger. I’ll gladly take this diagnosis, a broken finger beats a broken knee cap any day of the week.

I’m sure my doctor thinks I’m out of my mind as I attempt to explain cyclocross, how I keep getting hurt crashing and my love of ballet. How many “hobbies” that take a tole on your legs and feet can I get myself into?

Anyway, he suggested that I should take another month or so off from ballet and I should quit crashing during cyclocross racing. It’s hasn’t been easy not taking my normal load of classes every week for the last month, and another month off seems like forever. What will I do?

I’m not in that video, but I have raced in several of the races shown, the US National Championships in particular.

Have Tights, Will Travel

I love to travel and I try to travel as much as I can. This time out, Portland and the San Francisco Bay Area, hellz yeah motha’ trucka!! This trip was loosely scheduled, I had a few airline reservations to meet but aside from those it was completely unscheduled. Go ride the bike (which came with me) ok, hang out in seedy bars, all right, find an open ballet class, okey dokey… I f’ed up in Chicago several month ago, missed a train and missed my class. I was hell bent to not let this happen again, fingers crossed, knock on wood, whatever it takes.

Luckily enough, I found an Int/ Adv class in Portland, and I was able to take the class and still make my train to San Francisco. It was fun, but strange. First off it was at 9:30 am, never seen any class that early. The strangeness crept in when we began doing barre work with our right hand on the barre, that was enough to really throw me. I know there isn’t that much difference between hands, but when you do something for years the same way everyday and then you switch things up it might mess with your head, I can say it did for me. She was so casual about it that I didn’t catch it at first, then it just was really odd and slightly disconcerting.

Then I had all the time in the world in San Francisco, (btw dear readers, don’t call it “Frisco,” they will loose their shit.) however I was never in the right part of town when I needed to be or if I was I didn’t have my magic bag o’ tights.

Not having what you need can really put a cramp in your plans, I suppose I could have just shown up in my jeans. Sure they are tight and stretchy but I can’t imagine wearing them in class, but more importantly I didn’t have a dance belt which means no class regardless of jeans style. There was a girl in a class a year or so ago who wore jeggings to class for quite awhile. And yeah yeah, I know my jeans are snug, some say tight, that’s the way I like them, and I rock the shit out of ‘em, but that’s beside the pointe.

Even if i had made it to a class my legs were already cooked. I had been riding hills (super serial steep grades, crazy steep, like nearly straight up steep) it’s hard not to in San Francisco. I can’t image how awful a class would be with legs that were completely dead and all noodle like. I’ll never bitch about steep streets again for I have met and bested the steepest of streets.

Plans were kinda made to meet up with some fellow ballet bloggers but that didn’t quite workout. It would have been fun, but that’s how things work some days. I will be back to the City soon enough, and hopefully our schedules will work out better next time.

If you should ever find yourself in Portland you have to visit Powell’s Books, it fan-fucking-tastic! It had the biggest dance section I’ve ever seen. The whole aisle, not just a shelf.

I apologize for the less than stellar photography here today, both of my cameras died days into my vacation and I ended up having to rely on my cell phone to record my journeys. Not happy about this at all. All I see are $$$$$ in my future to hopefully get them back up and running. Plus both have been with me more than half way around the globe and are there for me 24/7, pretty bummed.

Please, a moment of silence for my seemingly dead cameras.

Thank you.

 

Putting Yourself Out There

You ever get something stuck in your head and it just sticks, sometimes good other times bad, and often times ballet? Not to bad right? I find ballet creaping into all sorts of places. I’m sure my convo with my friend and teammate on Super Awesome Cycling Team Not Named After Cable Television Networks about how she finds ballet influences her racing. I was like, jeeze why didn’t I think of that earlier, it made perfect sense to me. Not sure what I’m talking about, just read my last post.

Teammate “Some Girl” executing a beautiful cyclocross dismount pirouette.

Anyway, I’m out riding, preparing for a race I which I did horribly on, and more importantly getting ready for cyclocross season in the fall. It just hits me, to be even moderately successfully at both cycling and ballet, you need to just trust yourself and just put yourself out there. You know there is a good chance of failure of some degree and an equal chance of success, as is life. Both will have you eventually in the eyes of everyone, with very few places to hide (most of the time anyway). This can difficult to accept this especially at first. It can run the scale from; what evez (complete with a shoulder shrug and eye roll) to intimidating beyond belief, especially for those who are new.

I know in both situations I started out doing my best to hide and blend in with everyone in the field or studio. I’d get my work in and then fade away. I literally once tried to hide behind anyone and anything while avoiding any eye contact with my teacher because I felt totally overwhelmed in class once because I was afraid of failing a combination yet again. I eventually figured it out a week or so later. But, you know what? I’ve gotten to the point where I’ve learned that I don’t really care about all of those eyes. They may or may not be on me as I race or dance, but you know for sure they will be on you for sure instant you slip up and miss a step or clip another’s wheel and end up at the bottom of a pile of bikes. It’s a bit unfair, but that seems to be the way it is. No one ever sees that double you just nailed or finally getting by you nemesis with one lap to go, but like I said, that’s just how it is, accept it and keep moving on.

I’m out there doing something that I dearly love and I’m doing it for no one else but me. I know I’m far from the best, I know my technique is a bit rough around the edges to put it mildly, I’m not as fast as I could or should be, but so what, right? I know that I’m not going pro with either, but I want to be the best that I can be, and I’m the judge of my success, even if the actual judges and teachers are grounded in reality and all that craziness.

So dear readers, it’s a bit of a cliché, but ride hard, ride for yourself and dance like nobody is watching!

Four more pirouettes with great extensions.

BTW, as of today we have three riders on the team with a background in ballet. I have a feeling that number might rise, haven’t heard back from everyone yet.

A little attitude for you, from me!

Why Didn’t I Think Of That!?

I’m always amazed how something can be so obvious, practically dangling right there in front of you like a carrot on a string in front of a mule and you are completely obvious of anything there. Well dear readers I had one of those moments yesterday while wasting my friends valuable time at work chatting with them on the internets.

Long story short, one of my teammates on Awesome Cycling Team Not Sponsored By A Cable Television Network is a former pointe shoe wearing bunhead and an elite cyclist. (A side note here, my iPad wants to autocorrect bunhead to but head.) Who knew, right? So anyway, somehow we got talking about ‘cross and ballet and she drops some serious knowledge on me, the most obviousness I referred to earlier. She has a complete ballet to bike connection, she breaks her races down into movements and counts.

I’m like OMG! Why the f didn’t ever think of that. Truth be told I do attribute some of my racing skills to my time spent in ballet, my remounting for one (nothing is more enjoyable than the big ass jumps we never get to do enough of in class) It screams ballet, at least to me anyway. I’ve got photos of myself in mid leap with legs in attitude, it’s actually in a post several months back. Or is it vice versa, who know, another mystery for the ages. Anyway, go ahead and scroll down, I’ll wait for you, actually here is a link. No, go ahead, I’ll wait for you.

Found it? Good, back to the story. I also count out things as well, they don’t always work out into neat little groups of eight, but oh well, ya do whatcha’ gotta do. I was a mess at ‘cross until I found a good spot and watched the elites at nationals several years ago make it look easy. That’s where I first figured out a long standing issue, running remounts. I broke it own into a little movement, I figured out the count, marked it and set it to memory and I’ve never had a problem with remounts again. I somehow missed that obvious ballet connection, all this time it was right there. Oh well, I see it now.

It’s all counting and timing, staying focused, keeping that ideal form, keeping your turnout, pulling up that little string on the top of your head… All the while hoping when you screw up nobody will see it and pretending nothing happened.

The coolest thing dear readers, is that we both have this shared interest. We took completely different routes to get to where we are today, but that’s not important, the important thing is we have this shared experience and can build on it. Oh, and I pestered her into looking for classes, I really hope she has the time and gives ballet another shot.

Seven Years Bad Luck?

Question, when is Big City Fancy Pants Company School not such a fancy pants school? Answer, when they spend millions of dollars rehabilitating a former power plant into the most amazing studio space that you will ever seen but are soon forced to close for three weeks so they can replace each and every mirror in each and every studio because they are all warped, fun house warped.

It was like a carnival fun house at times, you would be gracefully dancing across the floor (I know that ain’t happening, but if I tell myself that enough I might begin to believe it) you glance into the mirror and you’re three feet tall and your feet are five feet wide, or you’re eight feet tall and your arms stretch half way across the studio.

Sorry my dear non-American readers, I don’t normally use the the far superior metric system, I forget just what that would work out to be in meters. The half-assed American public school system gave us a sometimes half-hearted attempt to teach us the metric system, but the teachers (in my school anyway) thought it was pointless/stupid and they went right along using the English system even though the books were designed for metric. It became incredibly hard to figure because the ciriculum was in metric and you would get a mega-crazy answers if you used the English system.

I was like, “You know Mr Six,” yes my math teacher in 7th grade was named Six. “If you flip your ruler over it comes out to something sensible like 12 centimeters, they all come out to reasonable numbers, non of this crazy ass 1 55/230th of an inch or something ridiculous like that.”

“Naww, we’ll stick with inches and pounds here.”

“But the book is all metric, why are you messing with our heads?” I got no answer and was rarely ever called on again. I’ll pause here my dear readers as you wrap your mind around that one. To be the defiant one that I can often be I went ahead and did everything the easy way, metric, and got them counted wrong, not because my answers were wrong, but “I didn’t follow the instructions.”

Ok, got it all figured out? Good, now I’ll continue, I’ve gotten way off topic. So yeah, out they go, a shit ton of mirrors (I’m guessing the metric equivalent would be a metric shit ton?) Now, I know it’s, break a mirror and get what seven years bad luck? What if you are a professional mirror replacer where I’m sure you breaking mirrors all the time. Is there some special clause for them, or are they just totally hosed, and soon will fall victim to all of those years of bad luck they are accumulating?

Anyway, hopefully everything will be up to speed at Big City Fancy Pants Ballet Company School some time next week, and not too many years of bad luck will befall everyone (fingers crossed). ‘Cuz I’ve had my fair share of bad luck of late and I don’t need to add on any more.

FYI, According to the CIA Factbook there are only three, count them three holdouts sticking with the English system; Burma, Liberia and the United States. That’s some pretty impressive company!!

Called In Sick

So I’ve had a stressful last few weeks, no need to get into just what it is, I’m afraid I’d come out looking like a bitter old man, which I’m pretty sure I am not. Anyway, I decided while I was having lunch yesterday that I’d take a “mental health break” and call in sick. They make it really easy, just call in and press buttons. You don’t even have to lie to a real person just a series of, press one if your stressing out and don’t feel like working and your not really sick, but we don’t have a phoney excuse number to press, so just press number one and be done with your deception. Feeling good lying to my employer I kicked back had a few adult type beverages knowing I didn’t have to wake up way too early.

I thought I’ve been feeling pretty good the last few weeks at ballet and I know Big City Fancy Pants Company School offers an int/ adv class on Wednesday mornings at their studios in the ‘burbs. I heard it was a good and challenging class, What the hell I thought, I’ll drop in and get my jete on. You may remember my dear readers, I have had an off an on relationship with these upper level classes, well you could now say I’m in the off position now after today’s experience. This was by far the most difficult ballet class I’ve ever attempted, fo sho! Barre, which is usually straight forward regardless of class was difficult and often confusing, it was like she was just making up shit to mess with my head. I’m like holy fuckin’ shit, this is gonna’ be the longest 90 minutes of my life while wearing tights. Ughh!

Thank dog, there was another person struggling too, there is something comforting knowing your not the only one failing miserably. We always ended up doing the cross studio combos together, we must have looked lost, the good girl hopped out of line and led us through everything, otherwise would have just stood there and looked stupid, well more than normal.

This got me thinking, who has time to go to a ballet class on a Wednesday morning anway? It wasn’t like it’s a bunch of college students or retirees with open schedules and the class is too long to be done on a lunch break. Maybe they all called in sick too, like me, (cough cough).

Oh yeah, went to a movie on the way home, I love afternoon movies!

Yeah, I Know…

Pointe Shoes: Hey dude, what’s the deal, you haven’t worn me in class since like December. Where’s the love, I thought you liked to dance with us.

Me: Well, I did, but the more I wore you the more my ankle hurt.

PS: Hey dude, don’t try to blame that on me, you’ve have had that problem for years.

Me: Yeah, but I’m good at blaming others for my problems (laughing).

PS: You totally threw us under the bus.

Me: Yep, I sure did. But, I discovered something. I had forgotten what it’s like to dance in my soft shoes, it’s a completely different experience that I had nearly forgotten. No offense to you guys, but I felt like I was clomping around with you, like when you try to walk in ski boots, less than graceful. The softies felt like I was dancing on clouds.

PS: Oh yeah, blaming the tools are you? I’d say you should blame the operator.

Me: Easy there, I love ya. I pulled you out and wore you tonight, the first time in months. And do you want to know what? It was great, not even a twinge of pain. Probably not the best idea right now, but what the hell.

PS: Oh, I know, it was fun. It seemed like you knew what you were doing.

Me: I know, it was fun. You can thank a couple of the girls in class one of which also en pointe and were wondering why I wasn’t wearing you lately. We will do more, I promise. As long as the ankle feels good, we will be good. Meanwhile, back in the bag, see you soon.

Me: BTW, you were famous for a few months, your photo was used on an online dance wear site.

PS: Yep, I did know, I’m quite good looking. I can’t believe you made them take that photo of me.